What Really Happens When You Feel Like an Imposter - And How to Reclaim Control
You know the moment.
You’re fully qualified. Prepared. Maybe even the expert in the room.
And yet, you freeze.
A boardroom presentation, a media interview, a simple team huddle.
Something about the spotlight turns your internal volume up. Loud.
"What if I mess this up?"
"Why did they even pick me?"
"Don’t say something stupid."
This isn’t stage fright.
This is the inner game turning against you.
And it’s exactly what Timothy Gallwey uncovered in The Inner Game of Tennis, a concept that goes far beyond sport, right into the heart of what it means to lead, perform, and show up under pressure.
This is the psychology of Imposter Syndrome.
And it’s not what you’ve been told.
The Two Selves: Why Confidence Isn’t the Real Problem
In The Inner Game of Tennis, Timothy Gallwey describes two selves we all have:
Self 1 is the inner voice - the conscious, analytical critic.
Self 2 is the doer - the part of you that knows how to perform.
When you’re in flow? That’s Self 2 in charge.
When you’re spiralling with doubt? That’s Self 1, the conscious critic, taking over.
And here’s the kicker:
Imposter Syndrome isn’t a lack of ability; it’s a Self 1 overload.
Gallwey argued that Self 2 (your unconscious performer) knows what to do, because it’s done it before. It’s trained, practiced, lived through the reps.
But Self 1? It wants to control. To perfect. To judge.
And under pressure, it shouts the loudest.
“You’re not qualified enough.”
“You got lucky.”
“You’re going to mess it up.”
The result? A loss of trust in your own ability, even when the evidence says otherwise.
What the Research Actually Says About Imposter Syndrome
First, let’s rethink the term.
The word syndrome implies dysfunction. Something broken that needs fixing.
But for most high performers, what we’re dealing with is more nuanced. It’s not a disorder. It’s a disconnect.
The more accurate term? Imposter Phenomenon.
Coined by psychologists Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes in 1978, their research showed that high-achieving women, despite credentials and accomplishments, often attributed their success to luck or timing.
Since then, research has reinforced this idea:
Up to 70% of people will experience imposter thoughts in their careers (Bravata et al., 2020)
It’s most common in high performers, those navigating career transitions, visibility pressure, or working under minority stress
It intensifies with success, not the other way around
The core insight?
Imposter Phenomenon isn’t low self-esteem.
It’s a mismatch between your external results and your internal narrative.
It’s when Self 1 refuses to trust Self 2, no matter how many wins you’ve earned.
Why High Performers Are So Susceptible
It’s easy to assume that imposter thoughts show up when you’re out of your depth.
But that’s not usually the case.
They show up because you’re in unfamiliar territory, and because you’ve always held yourself to a high standard.
For most high performers, the internal pressure doesn’t go away as they grow.
It compounds.
You’re used to being the one who delivers.
The one who figures it out.
The one who sets the bar, quietly raises it… and then tries to meet it again without breaking stride.
So, when the stakes get higher, more visibility, more responsibility, more expectation - you don’t just face the challenge in front of you.
You also face a fear:
What if I can’t keep this up?
That’s often when the imposter thoughts creep in.
Not because you’re incompetent.
But because you’ve linked confidence to certainty, and now, things feel new.
And instead of seeing that wobble as a normal part of growth,
The conscious critic (Self 1) decides it’s a problem to fix.
“You should be more confident than this.”
“You shouldn’t need support.”
“You’re the one people expect to have the answers.”
That’s the trap.
You don’t talk about it, because you think you shouldn’t feel it.
But the truth is, this has nothing to do with your CV or skills.
It’s about your relationship with uncertainty.
And whether or not you let that doubt define you.
The Difference Between Imposter Syndrome and Incompetence
Let’s pause here.
Because there’s a difference between feeling like an imposter and actually being out of your depth.
Imposter thoughts aren’t proof you’re underqualified. They’re often a byproduct of deep competence.
Why? Because the more skilled you are, the more aware you become of what you don’t know. That’s not weakness. That’s perspective.
The Dunning-Kruger effect, a well-documented cognitive bias, shows that those with the least ability often overestimate their competence.
Meanwhile, those with real expertise tend to underplay it.
They see the gaps. They question their readiness. They want to get it right.
“In other words:
The very fact that you’re asking “Am I good enough?” might be the strongest signal that you are. ”
Tomas Chamorro-Premuzic says it well:
“Incompetent people are often unaware of their incompetence.
The ones questioning themselves? Those are usually the people you want in charge.”
So, the goal isn’t to silence your doubt completely. It’s to listen without letting it lead.
To know the difference between fear… and fact.
Shifting from Self 1 to Self 2
Gallwey's mental model is powerful because it offers a way out:
To perform at your best, you don’t need to silence Self 1 completely, you just need to stop letting it lead.
Here’s how:
1. Name the Narrator
Next time the voice says, “You’re not good enough,”
try: “That’s Self 1 talking.”
This disidentification creates space.
It’s a core strategy from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), helping you notice thoughts without fusing with them.
2. Visualise Like Self 2
Mental rehearsal activates the same neural pathways as physical practice.
Picture yourself doing the thing, not perfectly, but instinctively.
The goal isn’t perfection.
It’s trust.
3. Use the Body to Calm the Mind
When Self 1 is loud, go back to physiology.
Breathwork, grounding techniques, and body-based cues calm your nervous system, shifting you out of hyper-analysis and back into presence.
Try this:
Inhale for 4 counts
Hold for 4
Exhale for 6
Repeat for 2 minutes
This helps reset the prefrontal cortex and allows Self 2 to come back online.
Five Mental Patterns That Keep You Stuck in Imposter Mode
Experiencing Imposter Phenomenon, rarely looks like obvious panic.
More often, it hides behind polished performance and silent overthinking.
These five patterns are the most common ways high performers unconsciously reinforce the inner conscious critic, and block Self 2 from leading.
1. The Overfunctioner
You outwork everyone, not to grow, but to prove you deserve the seat you’re already in.
You equate effort with legitimacy.
The problem? Burnout masquerades as diligence. You never feel “done,” because Self 1 keeps moving the goalposts.
Try this shift:
Don’t just ask, “Did I do enough?” Ask:
“What would someone who already belongs here do next?”
2. The Inner Narrator
You’re in the room, but also in your head.
Every word, every action is followed by commentary:
“Was that the right thing to say?”
“They probably think I’m not qualified.”
This loop pulls you out of presence.
You’re observing instead of engaging.
Try this shift:
Name the pattern. “Ah, there’s my narrator.”
Then redirect. One breath. One action. Back to Self 2.
3. The Image Manager
You focus on how it looks instead of how it feels.
Approval becomes the currency.
You second-guess instincts, defer decisions, and dilute your edge - all to be perceived a certain way.
The cost? You lose access to instinct. To truth. To presence.
Try this shift:
Ask: “What would I say or do if I wasn’t trying to be liked, but trying to lead?”
4. The Expert Trap
You think you need to know everything before you can act.
Self 1 tells you it’s not safe to contribute until you’re bulletproof.
You delay decisions. Avoid visibility. And miss key growth moments.
Try this shift:
Confidence isn’t knowing it all, it’s being willing to move forward while learning.
Try:
“What do I already know?”
“What’s one informed step I can take, even if it’s not perfect?”
5. The Deflector
Praise doesn’t land.
You respond with: “Oh, it was nothing.”
Or “I just got lucky.”
Self 1 filters every compliment through a lens of disbelief.
And when you can’t absorb success, it never turns into self-trust.
Try this shift:
Pause after praise. Just say, “Thank you.”
Then ask:
“If I let that land, what would I believe about myself?”
Don’t Silence the Voice - Just Stop Taking Orders From It
Self 1 will always be there.
You don’t need to eliminate it. You just need to lead it, not be led by it.
Imposter Syndrome doesn’t mean you’re broken.
It means your perception needs updating.
Self 2 is ready.
It knows how to lead. To show up. To perform.
It just needs you to step aside long enough to let it.
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Not necessarily. It can signal growth or stretch moments. But when it paralyses action or erodes wellbeing, it needs addressing.
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You can’t eliminate it entirely, but you can build better tools to navigate it - turning it from a blocker into a cue for reflection and recalibration.
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Yes. Especially them. Confidence and imposter thoughts can (and often do) coexist, it’s not about identity, it’s about internal noise.
At Your Future Forward, I help you rewire performance from the inside out so that you can lead with resilience, confidence and clarity in your career, business and life. If you'd like to know more about upgrading your Mental Operating System, drop me a line here.
Stay strong, stay balanced
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